Essay No. 1 -- A Turning Point

On July 1, 2009, I moved out of my parent’s house. I was a nineteen year old college student; I had a car and two steady jobs. I rented a room from a woman that I found on Craig’s List. I had pictured moving out to be an amazing growing experience, and in a way, it was. I tried to work hard. I had fun with my friends, and met a lot of new people. My life seemed to be heading in the right direction.  By the end of October 2009, I had quit one of my jobs, and I had lost the other. I struggled to keep my head above water for a little while, but it was soon evident that I was drowning. I was devastated and humiliated that I had to crawl back to my parent’s house and essentially start over. My parents made it an easy transition, though, and on November 1st, I moved back in.

On November 10, 2009, I found out I was 6 weeks pregnant. I can’t say that my pregnancy was an accident, but I was somewhat surprised. At this point, I was faced with a life-changing decision. As I stood in the bathroom, dozens of thoughts swirled around in my head. No one knew about the baby. I could easily terminate the pregnancy and my parents would never have to know. I could ask one of my friends to support me, and they would, without hesitation. The moment I saw the test read yes, however, I couldn’t stop smiling. I couldn’t believe that I was carrying inside me a little perfect baby! The odds were against me. I had no money to my name.  There was a big chance that I was going to end up a single mother, seeing as my child’s father was apathetic about the news, to say the least. It was also likely that my parents would be so upset with me that they would tell me to leave their home just as soon as I had returned. But to me, none of those possibilities mattered.  At that moment, I knew that I would never let anyone or anything come in between the two of us.

            My pregnancy was physically non-complicated, but emotionally draining. My parents did not send me out into the street. Instead, they almost immediately accepted what was inevitably going to happen and like me, believed that abortion was a not an option. However, they did not approve of the situation that I found myself in. Basically, my parents checked out from any emotional relationship they had with me whatsoever. Our relationships consisted of everyday niceties, but nothing more. It was a hard time for me because I still longed for a relationship with my child’s father, even though a healthy one never formed. I spent most of my time alone, but productively. I read as much as I could about pregnancy, childbirth, and parenting. I watched programs on TV. I looked up articles on the internet, and I asked peers that were in similar situations as me. I gained a lot of knowledge in a short amount of time. I attended childbirth preparedness classes and spent time reading to my baby. Although I was alone, I rarely felt lonely.

One day in early June, I had a little scare. I had begun reading about labor and I believed I was in the early stages. The first thing I did was to call my doctor who informed me to head straight to the Emergency Room in order to check on my status and make sure the baby was alright. After I hung up the phone, I immediately dialed my child’s father’s phone. After hearing the news he said that he would stand by the phone to get further directions from me, whether or not to head to the hospital as well. After I arrived at the hospital and they did further tests including an ultrasound, the nurse concluded that I was not in labor and I should head home. I tried to contact my child’s father to alert him of the news, but I could not reach him. I didn’t speak to him for another month.

On July 5^th 2010 at 2:00 AM, I was in my bed reading a baby development book, when I began to notice that the contractions I was having – which I believed to be Braxton Hick’s – were coming more often and with more strength. At around 3:00 AM, I went into my mother’s room to inform her and she stayed up with me, counting the time in between contractions and reminding me to breathe. When my contractions started to become too intense, we decided to head to the hospital. We made it to the hospital at around 5:30 AM and the nurse informed me that I was 4cm dilated, and I opted to receive an epidural. My labor slowed down quite a bit as a result, and I spent most of the day sleeping. At around 3 or 4 in the afternoon, the doctor decided to break my bag of waters. Soon after, I was instructed to begin pushing. I pushed for about an hour and a half, until the doctor informed me that it would be safer for me and the baby to be delivered through a C-Section. Although unhappy about the news, I did have a C-Section, and it was a good thing I did.

My daughter, Laila, was born on July 5^th, 2010 at 10:08 pm. She was born with pneumonia, many respiratory complications, and at 8lbs, 7oz. Because of my bag of waters being broken, it created an infection which my daughter had inhaled while she was still in my stomach. If I had delivered her naturally, she would have sustained many more complications. Laila stayed in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit for ten days while she received antibiotic treatment. Her father came to visit her three days later, and he came a few times while she was in the NICU. I finally was allowed to bring her home on July 15^th, and we haven’t looked back.

My daughter is now 18 months old and despite a few minor respiratory issues, she is doing great. I am a single mother who works 3 part-time jobs and goes to school full-time. Moving out of my parent’s house was a life-changing experience for me. I grew up quickly in a short period of time. I learned many lessons, some easy, some hard. I wouldn’t change the experiences I had or the time I spent learning these lessons because they made me the independent, hard-working person I am today.

It's All About ME

  My name is Shaina Monai Talbert. I was born on March 19^th, 1990 in Cleveland, Ohio. I lived in Ohio for less than one year when my mother and I moved to California to be with her sisters. My mother married my stepfather in December 1992, and we moved into the house that I have lived in the majority of my life in that same month. I went to Mar Vista Elementary School, Ocean View Junior High, and Channel Islands High.

  I am a single mother, full-time college student, and part-time barista/switchboard operator. My daughter is 18 months old and her name is Laila. She is my motivation and the best thing that has ever happened to me. I am a Child Development major at Oxnard College. I also work on campus as a switchboard operator and just recently landed a job as a Teacher’s Assistant in the campus’ Child Development Center. I am also a part-time barista for a Target Starbucks.

  In five years, I hope to have established a life for my daughter and me. I hope that we will live in a place of our own and will be secure in our own lives. I really wish that I become self-sufficient, because now I am currently (partially) dependant on my parents. I hope that I will have settled into my teaching career, and into a committed relationship.

An Interview with : Cindy Avalos

I am Mexican-American. I am from a family of 6. 4 brothers and 2 sisters. I grew up in poverty. Neither one of my parents graduated from junior high, they are both agricultural workers. I graduated from high school in 2009. I got pregnant at age 16, had my first child at 17. I have two daughters, ages 4 and 2.

I would like to pursue a field of nursing because I am interested the healthcare system. I want to work in oncology in a children’s hospital or with blood disorders. I want to advocate for young children. I want to be able to provide my family with a good lifestyle so I need to pursue a career in order to do that.

I go to school full-time. I have 15 units. I work as a student ambassador for 20 hours a week. I lead tours around the college, I promote college enrollment and I am a peer advisor. I am a member of the ASL Club that I attend a club meeting once a week.

My mother helps to provide childcare when I have to attend class or work. On nights and weekends, I try to spend as much time with my children as possible, and I do as much homework as I can when they’re asleep. I also have my children in daycare on the college’s campus so that they are close to me during the day and so that I am still able to have a bonding experience with them on the rides to and from school.

My mother and my sister are motivations to me because they show me how I can provide a better life for my children and they push me to do better. My supervisor at work helps me a great deal, she gives me great advice when I need it, and she guides me in the right direction. My biggest motivation would have to be my children, because I want to provide a better future for them. I want them to be able to see that you never stop learning, that no matter where you start, you can always grow in education and make yourself better. I want them to be committed to a process of lifetime of learning.

Three words I would use to describe myself would be: optimistic, strong, and ambitious.

Ten years from now I see myself with a Bachelor’s of Science and Nursing. I see myself working at the children’s hospital in Los Angeles and probably going back to school to work on my master’s degree. Hopefully I will have a nice place to live in Los Angeles with my children, and I see myself single for now.

My philosophy for succeeding in school is that I need to be able to give back to the community because I want to help people who have less than I do. I want to be a role model for my children and other children.

But my biggest philosophy is to be able to provide a good example for my children that no matter what your background or where you start, you can make something of yourself.  I was a single parent but I was able to do all that I wanted for myself and for their lives because I was motivated.

I like the professors at Oxnard College. I like the programs that are provided for students such as EAC, EOPS, and CalWorks. I really appreciate how such programs are there to help students if they need them.

I think Oxnard College could improve by paying attention to the student’s feedback during evaluations so that curriculum and products that the professors provide are more effective for students. I believe that the college should listen to the students so that there will be a smaller dropout and withdrawal rate and it would benefit the entire school.

I came from poverty and I was surrounded by people that viewed education as unimportant, and so for the first years of my life, I didn’t make education a priority. Once I had my children I became more motivated to pursue a better life and I have. So I can thank my past for giving me the motivation to become a better person.

I am most surprised about my college experience that I enjoy my classes. I am getting a connection with my professors and my learning experience has made me a better person and given me a different outlook on life. I have been exposed to different cultures and people and to be heading for the same goal is a beautiful thing.

HATEtextingLOVE

I have a love / hate relationship with texting. Texting is one of life's more convenient yet complicated inventions. I am unfortunately addicted to this simple way of communication. I hate texting because no matter how hard you try, you can never seem to convey the exact emotion you want to. Sarcastic texts come across rude and romantic texts come out vague. There are also those you can call the textually challenged. A textually challenged person usually takes an hour or more to respond to you, and when they do respond, their text doesn’t answer the original question you asked or contains numerous spelling errors. It is also very difficult to recognize whether the person you originally texted is the one who is responding to you, especially in the case of shared phones. On the other hand, I really love being able to engage in conversation with someone new without the worry of cracking voices or awkward pauses. One of the best (and worse) things about texting is - lying. It is easy to say that you never received a text message or that you replied to one, but the recipient's phone is to blame. I have a love / hate relationship with texting. The sad truth is, I'll never be able to give it up.